10 Ways to Make Sex Sexier

You’re not quite sure how — or when — it happened. You used to have so much fun in bed, but suddenly your sex life just isn’t what it used to be. By 11 p.m. you’re more interested in The Daily Show than in a steamy session with your guy. Even when you do work up the energy, sex feels so…predictable. The excitement, even the passion, are MIA.

The thing is, you like sex — a lot. And you love your partner. So what gives? “There are all kinds of emotional barriers to having good sex, from poor body image to boredom,” says sex therapist Laura Berman, PhD, director of the Berman Center in Chicago and author of The Passion Prescription. “The good news is that you can get beyond them and reconnect with your sensuality.”

Ready to light your fire? These moves will make sex hotter, happier, and just plain sexier.

1. Like yourself naked.

Women who have the best sex lives feel good about their bodies, says Joy Davidson, PhD, a sex therapist in New York City and the author of Fearless Sex. “They see themselves as strong and sexy.” Unfortunately, according to Berman, up to 80 percent of women in the United States suffer from a negative body image. “Typically, when a woman looks at herself, her eyes go straight to her problem areas,” says Berman. “She carries that feeling into the bedroom, and when her partner’s kissing her thighs, she’s busy thinking, ‘God, I’m so fat!'” To boost your body confidence, give yourself a reality check. The next time you’re at the store or in the gym, take a look around you at all the attractive women who are a variety of shapes and sizes. Remind yourself: There is no one ideal. Then ask your partner what he loves about your body, and write it down.

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