Five Sex Tips for Women About Men

Our husbands don’t just want sex; they want us to want them.

1)  Men want to be desired too. As women, we are socialized to be the objects of desire, not the owners of desire.  We grow up thinking that sex is something that happens to us, not something we make happen. Seldom do we feel as agents of our own sexual lives.  Bombarded with messages from the media about impossible physical standards we are often wracked with insecurity.  We may struggle to reveal our erotic imagination lest we raise suspicion or resentment in our partner.

But a commitment to grow strong in our erotic core fulfills our pledge of fidelity – which involves moving away from others, yes, but more importantly, into an exciting sexual relationship.  Our husbands don’t just want sex; they want us to want them.  Wanting confirms our love and reveals our vulnerability. For many men, sex is love, sex is connection, and a woman’s sexual initiation, compliments, and “winks across the party” offer deep feelings of both excitement and security.

The media is increasingly adding pressure on men about their appearance and even guys who have never been vain can succumb.  Working 60 hours a week to help provide for the family takes a toll on that athletic physique; aging can bring baldness, failing erections, wrinkles that subtract from his sex appeal or even his promotability!  It’s a rough, critical world out there and we need all need the affirming physical love of our partner.  More deeply though, in a monogamous relationship, sexual desire is what sets our lover apart as our unique.  Expressing our desire says, “I want you—we belong together.”

2) Stop, drop and roll every once in a while.  Women need lots of time to get into the mood and even more time to reach orgasm, but every time?  Even once in a blue moon, should you get yourself in the mood and ready, blow his mind. Unleashed aggression.  Be hungry.  Devour.  Forget Saran Wrap and babydoll nighties—dress up in DESIRE.

Read full article on Psychology Today