The Pelt paddle is made from a silky smooth matte black silicone that attracts little bits of fluff like nothing else, but I find it easier to clean than my shinier, grippier silicone toys – a lot of the time I just spray this with Lelo cleaner and wipe it down – and you can bleach it, boil it, and stick it in the dishwasher. It’s basically indestructible – I’ve even bitten it a few times (don’t look at me like that) and didn’t leave any dents behind. It measures just under twelve inches long, six inches of that being the handle, with a little hole at the very end which you can use to loop a ribbon or a nylon string through and keep it hung up with, or I guess you could loop something through it to use as one of those secure wrist loops. Does anyone actually use those things? 

I’m not very well versed in ~kinky terminology~ and I’m not in any kind of scene, all I know is I really love impact play, being bruised, and being hit. I started out with wooden hairbrushes and eventually graduated up through various leather and suede paddles, I’ve had some brief experiences with crops and floggers – crops are pretty fun, I haven’t found a flogger I’ve liked yet, never tried a bullwhip but I want to – but wooden oval paddles (and hands) have always been my favourite. The Pelt pretty much blows everything I just listed out of the water.

I don’t actually hold it like this, it’s just so nobody’s exposed to more of my chipping manicure than they need to be. Oops.

The silicone it’s made from is thick, but with lots of flexibility to it – it’s not floppy or flimsy by means but I can bend it over on itself, and this bendiness means that to deliver a really good hard slap you don’t have to put your back into it (figuratively) like you would do with a wooden or leather paddle. Seriously, you don’t need to put a whole lot of force behind this unless you know what you’re doing, you/your partner has asked for that and you both know how intense this paddle can be – when I first got this, as soon as I got it out of the bag I gave my bare leg a good whack with my arm drawn back how I normally would, which turned out to be a Very Big Mistake. I had a bright red mark come up immediately, the kind I usually get from being spanked repeatedly with a leather paddle. From one whack!

What I love about the Pelt is that with practice, you can easily deliver slaps that won’t sear your skin off – one thing I like doing is using my hand, not my arm, to wibble-wobble it slightly and by doing that you get a much gentler but still pleasantly stingy sensation. Being bruised, though, that’s my thing and that’s what I want from a paddle, and it delivers. I’m left with a big grin on my face and speckly purple skin after a session with the Pelt, and it gives me these beautiful bruises that take days to start to fade. I’m not able to describe the sensations it’s capable of giving as either solely ‘thuddy’ or ‘stingy’ – it really is more of a slapping sensation than anything, with a stingy warmth afterwards. I’m hella curious about what kind of sensation the Snap Strap gives out if this is anything to go by.

My man-thing sometimes calls me a ‘pain slut’ and I guess that’s true because after hearing on twitter about how you can get an even more intense sting from Tantus’ silicone paddles by using them wet, I toddled off to run myself a nice bath, had a soak and then went to town on my thighs. My legs looked a bit like barber poles by the end of it. I aimed to do six hard slaps on each leg but gave up at three because I just couldn’t handle it. It was like being whacked with a giant nettle leaf and I’ve definitely hit my limit with that one, but if you want a sharp sting on a larger surface area than a crop can give you, that could potentially do it for you – although, y’know, applying a good lube to the area you want spanking instead of popping in the shower every damn time would probably be more practical.

I’m pretty besotted with this paddle and it’s not going to be leaving my collection any time soon. I wouldn’t recommend it to a total beginner, but if you’re after something with a real good slap to to it, you’ve found it. Just remember to stock up on aftercare goodies beforehand.

You can buy the Pelt, and the rest of the Tantus silicone paddles at Tantus. All of them – except for the Plunge paddle – are $44.99 – and couples toys at Tantus are 30% off through the rest of March with code ‘GETDOWN’!

I probably should’ve put a jumper on that wasn’t covered in paint before I took this. Sorry to ruin your big moment, cush.

The Cush is all kinds of adorable for something that’s seven inches long and so girthy that I can only just fit my whole hand around the widest part. I received mine in the candy colour, which looks like someone poured a carton of semi-melted strawberry sorbet into a dildo mould and let it set, and as it’s from Tantus’ dual density O2 line it’s got this plush outerlayer that’s especially squishable (is that a word? I’m making it a word) at the tip – I can pinch and prod at this thing all day! It’s like one of those desktop stress relievers, except it’s phallic and you put it in your various orifices. For stress relief. And orgasms.

The Cush is a chubby little cutie – it measures just shy of 6 inches around over the bulgy tip, the prominent ridge midway down the shaft and at the base, where it feels firmest and the outerlayer is thinnest. It’s safe for butt stuff and even fits into my RodeoHs, but it causes major sagging and I have to wander around with this piece of semi-translucent silicone dangling between my thighs like a cowboy. The soft matte silicone attracts every bit of dust within a two foot radius, although not as badly as my other, shinier, grippier Tantus toys do (Goddess & Splash), but I would not advise an impromptu dildo-blowie unless you’ve just given it a good rinse. Even I don’t know why I keep doing that, you’d think I’d know better by now but I guess all my primary school teachers were right and I’m doomed to go through life getting lint in my mouth one way or another.

The Cush is currently the biggest insertable toy I own, and as it’s sooooo girthy (do not underestimate how big it is, I know I didn’t fully realise quite how large it is until I actually had one in my hands) I definitely need warmup before I use the Cush –  I’ve fallen into doing this three-step thing, kind of like my evening skincare routine, but instead of oil cleanse, tone, and moisturise, it’s wand, something glassy, Cush. I really can’t stress how important lube is here either, I’m actually on the lookout for a new, thicker but still water-based one as my much-beloved Sliquid H20 doesn’t work as well as I want it to with this unless I seriously slather it in the stuff. It’s too runny.

Oh my god though, it’s so worth the fuss. I don’t know what it does or how it does it but mary mother of christ and all her angels, jesus be a fence around me and protect me from the devil because this thing is STUPID good. The only explanation I can come up with is that it really fills me up – ugh, most disgusting wording ever, sorry – and as a result my g-spot has nowhere to hide. I don’t even have to work at it! It’s magic. Other people have mentioned in their reviews of the Cush that it can be difficult to thrust with because of the broad flat base, but I don’t really thrust with my dildos, I tend to do more of a jiggly movement, so this isn’t an issue for me.

I do have a little bit of a gripe with it though. That gorgeous ridge midway down the shaft? I stand no chance of getting that inside of me and it is maddening. Depending on how I’m using it or having it used on me, the deepest I’ve been able to take it is so that the ridge is just about tickling my vaginal entrance. So close! So far away! This is such a shame because I lllllove texture and I was really looking forward to feeling that beautiful ridge, but I guess it’s just not meant to be for me and my shallow vag. It’s also been puzzling me a bit, because I can definitely take my Mustang deeper than I can the Cush, and my dude-thing is around the same size as the Cush but slightly longer and thicker round his, uh, base? and I know that he goes deeper than the Cush. Maybe it’s because the 02 silicone has less give? If you can take this glorious toy in your butt or vag deep enough to feel that ridge, I salute you and please tell me all about it so I can live vicariously through you.

The Cush also works really well for harness use and as you’d expect, being fucked with it is amaaazing. I almost prefer using it that way to using it for masturbation but it can get a little overwhelming in the best kind of way with all that girth, and we have to use a more heavy-duty harness than we would with a smaller dildo as it does have a tendency to flop about and sometimes needs a bit of a helping hand.

I love, love, love my Cush. I like larger dildos to be squishy, and while it’s not as soft as I’d like it to be it’s still plushy enough to satisfy me – if you’re wondering about how O2 holds up to Vixskin, Vixskin is significantly softer and feels more ‘realistic’, but the O2 is more matte, doesn’t collect as much dust, doesn’t have the same borderline-tacky quality that Vixskin has and is less prone to sliding about. It’s cute as fuck and I don’t even have to do any weird angling to get it to hit my g-spot the way I want it to, it just does! It’s a true marvel. Thankyou, Tantus, for making this perfectly formed chunk of premium silicone, and please don’t ever discontinue it or I’ll cry, probably.

I was sent the Cush by the total angels over at Tantus in exchange for a review.