Monthly Archives: March 2014

kink queen of my world reviews silicone tantus

Tantus Pelt silicone paddle review

peltThe Pelt paddle is gorgeous. A smooth curve of charcoal silicone, it looks unassuming but packs a punch that’s unlike anything I’ve felt before. It’s in a league of it’s own, that’s for sure.

The Pelt paddle – made and designed by all-American brand Tantus – is made from a silky smooth matte black silicone that attracts little bits of fluff like nothing else, but I find it easier to clean than my shinier, grippier silicone toys; a lot of the time I just spray this with Lelo cleaner and wipe it down – and you can bleach it, boil it, and stick it in the dishwasher. It’s basically indestructible – I’ve even bitten it a few times (don’t look at me like that) and didn’t leave any dents behind.

It measures just under twelve inches long, six inches of that being the handle, with a little hole at the very end which you can use to loop a ribbon or a nylon string through and keep it hung up with, or I guess you could loop something through it to use as one of those secure wrist loops. Does anyone actually use those things? 

I’m not very well versed in ~kinky terminology~ and I’m not in any kind of scene, all I know is I really love impact play, being bruised, and being hit. I started out with wooden hairbrushes and eventually graduated up through various leather and suede paddles, I’ve had some brief experiences with crops and floggers – crops are pretty fun, I haven’t found a flogger I’ve liked yet, never tried a bullwhip but I want to – but wooden oval paddles (and hands) have always been my favourite. The Pelt pretty much blows everything I just listed out of the water.

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dildo glass green reviews

A Touch of Glass Double-O glass dildo review

swirlynewI was mainly attracted to the Double-O because of the colour. It’s a beautiful rich bottle green and when you hold it up to the sunshine it almost shimmers, it projects streams of lime green light onto the walls and if there were a way to keep it suspended in mid-air, like a classy version of one of those very early 2000’s hanging decorations that all my friends had stuck to their bedroom ceilings – I was jaw-clenchingly jealous of everyone who had those because my mum wouldn’t let me ‘wreck our house for the sake of a glitterball’ – GOD, mum – or maybe keep it perched regally on two tall pillars of glass? Pyrex? I would.

Unfortunately, I’m not clever enough to make either of those wildly impractical things so I just have to keep it in the lovely teal storage bag it came with. I can’t stress enough how ENTHUSED I am about it coming with a storage bag. I’m so over having to buy my own bags for things.

The Double-O is fairly slim, and measures just shy of 8 inches long. It’s got a distinct bend to it, each textured half curves upwards and with the bulbous ends it’s no surprise that it’s marketed mainly as a g-spot stimulator. The two textures each provide different sensations – one side has large, evenly spaced bumps, and the other a long, slender swirl. I’m not going to say it’s butt safe because it doesn’t have a flared base – I guess you could count the opposing bulb as a barrier of some kind, but I wouldn’t risk it. We all know how I feel about buttholes.

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butt stuff reviews steel

Review – Julian Snelling small steel Rosebud plug

pluggy1rose1

I’ve wanted a princess plug for years. It’s like a fixation. I’ve been looking for an affordable option for what seems like forever and who’d have thought? I stumbled onto the Rosebud’s website (did you know that their range was so vast? because I didn’t) and guess who was having a sale! Within 5 days of picking out my colour and paying that €21,50 + €9 shipping from France, a brown cardboard box landed on my doormat.

My plug came in a tiny little velvet bag, which I have of course managed to break the drawstring on and cover in miscellaneous fluff in the month or so I’ve had it. The plug itself is TEENY. I know this is the ‘small’ version (from what I can gather, Rosebud plugs come in four sizes- small, large, XL and XXL) but this is truly pocket size. It’s shorter than a lipbalm tube, has a reassuring weight to it, and while being smaller than I thought it was, it’s my favourite shape for a plug to be, with an almost lollipop-like bulb, a tapered tip, a long skinny neck and a flared base.

I’ve never actually lost something up my butt, but I’ve read enough cautionary tales and had enough gruesome stories told to me by a pal who’s training to be a nurse to be extra super cautious; I pretty much view buttholes as distant, organic relatives of vacuum cleaners at this point.

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